Lavender meets Jalepeno

Date day started off with a great pair of jeans and heels, it was still morning as we drove to Home Depot to pick out some Herbs for his garden. We had a fun time picking and choosing. The many smells surrounded us, invited us and provoked our senses. Being a little overwhelmed by the choices we compromised and gave ourselves each a personal plant. Lavender was sweet, fresh and clean. It was my kind of plant for all those reasons and more. Now, him on the other hand just needed "hot". This speaks on a level beyond food and continues on in our marriage. Intense would be the best way to describe it and a Jalapeno would give him just that. We played in the aisles, payed for our plants and left each other to do the rest of our own responsibilities.


Gardening would have been fun, getting down and dirty but a storm came in and the news anchor warned us of a tornado watch. "Genius" rented a movie and we sat together comforted by pitter-patter coming from the familiar sound of rain.

What are some interests that you and your spouse share that may seem like a chore to others but for you its pleasure? One time I pulled out a card that asked "What part of living on the farm would you least enjoy?" and to my surprise "Genius" said that there would be "nothing" where as I on the other hand was finding hard to find anything. Least to say we do not live on a farm, just growing a small garden of compromise.

Growing, Hope.

Dating do-over

All you moms out there know how important a date day is and how long it takes us to get ready for it, so last minute set backs are always a disappointment.


Last night was precisely that. Now I could tell you all the big details on how awful it was, raging all my thoughts out to a point where initially you would feel sorry for me and we would bond together in our misery. But as I sat there all curled and cute I made a decision to join in on our children's laughter, to take some of their enjoyment and make a date out of it. I went and changed into my sweats, grabbed a camera, and changed my attitude for both "Genius" and I.


The sun set quickly that day and in the end I wouldn't have exchanged it for that romantic dinner that I had longed for. This made me think about our children, how much they accept our faults every time we promise things with an understanding heart. In their eyes they see so much time ahead and its only in ours that we don't. Now I know that in the years ahead I will disappoint them but I hope that by then I had made time for good moments so they can understand the rest when they get older and give me some grace.


It really is about attitude. This is something I struggle with my own, let alone instill it in my children. How do you "turn your frown upside-down?" What do you do?

Do-over, hope.

Conversation Clothing

From a recent episode of the "Marriage Tune Up" video series the couple talked about words that have different meanings with men and women that can cause a communication gap. One of those words was "fine" and how to a male the word simply states "good" but the female hears "I don't care". We had a discussion time with the group and argued the differences. "Genius" said that for a better response the women should pick appropriate times depending on the situation and intrigue the male enough so that he is interested in giving you time.

That was exactly what I did for our date day. First, I bought a "boy-friend" t-shirt. I guess its a big hit these days and I thought it would be the perfect wear for our casual, backyard evening. Usually they have some kind of print on them but I didn't pay enough attention to see what it was. We were going to make pizzas on the grill and if the weather permitted build a fire outside. "Genious" walked in and I excitedly pointed out my "casual" look, its his favorite so I wanted him to notice. His response was unexpected when he asked who was on my new t-shirt.
"I don't know?" I replied. "Some chick."
He raised his eyebrows. "It's Pamela Anderson".
"What? How would you know?" I said completely confused as I looked down at my shirt. The print was black and white and was made to look distressed.
"How do you even see that?" I tried to put together the image of the female.
"Ya, its from the movie Barb Wire" He sounded certain.
"Is that weird?" I asked, before I interrupted myself and attempted on making a joke
"My hair is blonde so I guess I'm half-way there, You can call me Pam from now on." Sarcasm rang strong in my voice.
"Genious" laughed, the whole conversation had been fun and playful.
"You mean SPAM!" He teased.

That joke was the beginning of many more that followed and all evening long we laughed because almost anything can be connected to the famous PAM and her new knock-off SPAM. Unintentionally the shirt created interest and captured my husbands attention. A simple "fine" tee became "fantastic" ....and there is no second guessing that word.

I am now curious about the responses other females get as styles change and trends go in and out, what are they doing? And how are the husbands reacting? I have a friend that places attractive items on the bed for her husband to notice during the day so that their paths cross numerous times before she tries it on. What are some of the things you do and do they even get noticed? Let me know.

"Fine", hope.